Hmmm...

When your 3 year old comes into your home office completely naked with an armload of socks and says, "Mom! I have a whole bunch of socks!" with complete and utter glee, think there might be an issue with the laundry getting done on a normal/regular basis?

Mr. and Mrs. Spiderman

Marriage is rough at any age.

P's best friend in the world is a 6 1/2 year old girl we'll call "R." Usually, when they play together, they end up being Mr. and Mrs. Spiderman. Oh, the Spiderbabies they've had, let me tell you! Seems they've morphed the more action-oriented play of superheroes with the more... ok ... GIRLIE way of playing house. (Yes, yes. I know all about gender stereotyping, but come on. Playing house is girlie.)

Anyway - this is a conversation I had with P while we were waiting for R to come over and play.

P: "I hope R wants to play something besides Spiderman."

Me: "Well, you might want to take that Spiderman costume off, then."

P: "It doesn't matter,"

Me: "I think it might. Didn't you take it to her house yesterday, too? She probably thinks you *like* playing Spiderman all the time."

P: I do, but sometimes, I want to make up something new.

Me: Well, tell her! Maybe you can invent something together.

P: (big sigh) I try to, mom. Then she looks at me with those googly eyes and I just have to say, ' Ok. I'll play Spiderman.'

Me: (after laughing) If you're having trouble resisting a girl's googly eyes *now*, you don't have a chance, buddy.

P: I know. That's how it is when you're married.

Love Letter to Ikea

Dearest Ikea,

Please forgive me for the shameful way I abandoned you after I moved away. I had a naive belief that because I was "growing up," purchasing a new home and moving away from the transient college-student life and furnishings that you would no longer be a part of my life. I now realize how foolish I was being and humbly request that you overlook such folly and allow me to embrace you as an important part of my life yet again.

Even after my long absence and lackluster return, you not only fed me, but provided me with the tools to feed my family. You've replaced the darkness in my life with your bright, shining light. Where there was chaos, you helped me to purge the negative and create an organized, peaceful existence. Though it's been less than a day since our reunion, your presence in my home has created a noticeable difference.

I'm certain our bond will continue to grow despite the distance between us. We'll visit again soon. Until then, know that I will be thinking of you often.

Love,

SuperMomIsDead

A Quick Update

Yes, I've been neglecting this blog for quite some time. Quite honestly, there's been nothing outside the mundane day-to-day happenings to really write out - which is a good thing, I think. We've all - kids and parents alike - been in a holding pattern, just sort of doing our own things while orbiting around each other. Sure, there's a little bit of guilt because I've removed myself from the thick of things with the boys - but there were other things to be done and my boys have learned that Mom is not the sole keeper of the plan and have entertained themselves quite nicely for much of the time.

I've been tackling more of the nagging "To Do List Projects" that I've had since we moved in here last year. My focus has been on my bedroom and the massive decluttering of the entire house. In the past 2 weeks alone, I've made an upholstered headboard for our bed (my husband did all the wood cutting and assembling stuff), purchased new bedding and painted the room. We're going to put in some crown molding and if I could just find some art or pictures that I want to hang on the wall, I think I could be satisfied with my own little sanctuary. This will be the first time I've truly had a room all of my own design - EVER. I still have to paint our living and dining rooms, but at least I'll have my place to relax (should I ever stumble across a moment to relax!)

Oscar's Can-Side Grill

The Grouch can cook, I tell you!

Or at least, J thinks so. I swear - we've found the little guy munching from the trashcan more times than I care to admit. Not only that, but he will also remove things from the trash and hide them throughout the house. We've had lots of little discussions with him about this, believe me. Each time we catch him doing it, he just shrugs his shoulders and says, "But it's good."

One of his favorite snacks is dried fruit, which we generally have available in abundance. Last week, I let him have some dried mango and it was as if I had just given him the finest gourmet meal available. It was SO good, in fact, that he didn't want to put it down when he went in to use the bathroom. (pardon me while I shudder and vomit.) Anyway, I found about half of the package on the floor to the right of the toilet, right next to the bathroom wastecan. I, of course, freaked out when he picked it up and attempted to eat another piece. Tossing it into the trash, I told him (not so nicely) that we do not bring food into the bathroom and we certainly do not eat food that has been next to the toilet. (More gagging. I can't even stand thinking about it.)

A few minutes later, he appears at my side, chomping away on something. "What are you eating now, J?"

"Dried mango."

"From where?"

"From the bathroom."

Fighting an overwhelming need to vomit on the spot, I said, "YOU ARE NOT TO EAT THINGS FROM THE TRASHCAN!"

"It wasn't in the trashcan!" he insists.

"Well? Where did you get it?"

"I'll show you." He leads me by the hand, into the bathroom, crouches down on the LEFT side of the toilet, lifts up the bathroom scale and smiles up at me as he shows me his hidden stash.

WTF?!

I promise you that I do not starve my child. There are plenty of snacks within reach that are no where near trash cans OR toilets. WHY does he insist on doing this stuff? I swear it's because he knows it will COMPLETELY GROSS MOMMY OUT.

In the past 2 weeks, I've found him licking an empty popcorn bag (removed from the kitchen trash and stashed under his bed), a burrito of unknown age (at least 3 days, removed from the trash and stashed in his closet), scraping out an old yogurt container (at least it was FRESH trash!) and the crumbs at the bottom of a potato chip bag (leaving the bag in the trash can and just snacking buffet-style).

Yesterday was puke-a-palooza around here. It scared the hell out of him, too. Now, I don't have any first-hand knowledge that he ate something out of the trash in the last 48 hours that could cause this brief illness, but we certainly made him THINK his trash-stashes were at fault.

At least he gives new meaning to the term "Trash-Mouth."

Household Organization

For the past three days, I have been sorting and organizing every single thing I could get my hands on. I have more storage bins of every shape and size than the damned Container Store and a label maker to make it just a bit more anal-retentive looking. It's a sickness, really. Not quite OCD, but very, very strange. So - after shifting things around, switching up storage bins and moving furniture around, I just *had* to run out and buy more shelving so all of the storage bins could be arranged properly. As this startling feeling of satifaction took over my senses, it finally occurred to me that I was staring lovingly at a wall of metal shelves holding assorted plastic boxes with perfectly centered labels. THREE DAYS. THREE FREAKING DAYS. ***ONE*** ROOM.

We've also streamlined our "good behavior system" here, too. We've done the responsibility charts and lots of other token economy systems, but we always get lazy in filling them out, keeping track, etc. This time, each boy has a glass jar that they've decorated with stickers. They start each day with 20 coins/counters/chips. For each infraction, they give us one of their coins. At bedtime, we tally up what's left and the boys color in their score on a poster-sized bar chart. If they don't lose any coins during the day, they get a special treat (as this is a RARE event). The have to achieve certain levels to have certain privileges (TV, GameBoy, Playground, etc). If they lose all of their coins before bedtime, they go to bed 1/2 hour early. It's actually working really well for both boys.

Other than that, there's not much going on around here. We're in that summer holding pattern, I guess. No bloodshed, though. :)